At the End of the Day, It’s All the Same

Today was a total shit show an interesting day. My son completely lost it was in quite a mood after he dropped a donut on the floor of a coffee shop. He ran out and away from me, and I couldn’t find him for a good minute clearly communicated his feelings by asserting his independence. It was 90 degrees out and I was sweating from fear and the heat as I ran after him a really nice day to be active outdoors together. When I finally found him saw his cute little face around the corner, I screamed curse words loud enough for New Jersey to hear “Hallelujah!” I called my husband at work to curse at him too get his take on the situation.

Later, when I didn’t know where two of my kids were all was quiet, and while railing against first grade math helping with homework, I thought, Holy shit, we may survive the afternoon This is really nice.

While the kids were watching t.v. solving word puzzles while after doing homework, I realized that I had fallen asleep on the sofa for an hour lost track of time. I hadn’t even ordered made dinner. I quickly logged onto Seamless scoured the fridge for something to throw together. As usual In the absence of anything healthy, I ordered burritos.

As I was getting up from the table more times than I would think physically possible to retrieve things from the kitchen they could get themselves serving my family, I almost had a panic attack when I noticed I had ordered my daughter the wrong meal. She began wailing at a pitch to wake the dead used words to express herself boldly. She continued for thirty minutes; I was fed up impressed with her attitude enthusiasm. I said, “If this doesn’t stop, I will leave and not come back!” “Maybe you need some alone time.”

By bedtime, I had just freaking had it with everything we were all tired from the day. I turned the lights out not caring if after everyone brushed teeth.

I lay in the darkness, moving from one child’s bed to another because they insist they can’t be alone we value extended co-sleeping. I lay in the darkness, feeling guilty, like a failure, like the worst mother, anxious about everything to do after they fall asleep and the next day introspective about all the emotions of motherhood. I lay in the darkness of their room, grateful that tomorrow will be another day.

This entry was posted in Family Life, Humor, It's All About Me, Mental health, New York City Living and Coping, Parenting Moments and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to At the End of the Day, It’s All the Same

  1. Rae Schopp says:

    Love it😊😧

    Sent from my iPhone


  2. Christina says:

    Seriously, love this and you. It’s so nice to know I’m not the only one! I feel all the same things but could never articulate it so well. You rock, seriously.

  3. J Jay says:

    Thank God I have found you! I’m a grandma raising my grand daughter and have had all the guilt, and shame almost daily lately and hating myself for it. She’s 7 and so sensitive, I feel like a wretch. I’m just glad to know I’m not alone. Also I needed a good laugh!!!!!

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