Things I’ve Done (In 22 Lines)

Here are the top 22 things I have done.  Either in chronological or order of importance.  You be the judge.

I have:

1. Had Botox (could also be called “Turned 40”).

2. Cried with friends.

3. Been really, really, really afraid.

4. Been to funerals of people younger than myself.

5. Forgiven people.

6. Held grudges.

7. Been certain I had ruined my life.

8. Been grateful for a magical life.

9. Been threatened with a lawsuit.

10. Lied and been caught.

11. Lied and gotten away with it.

12. Lost myself.

13. Compromised myself.

14. Made amends with myself.

15. Had a girl crush.

16. Been humiliated (from Top 22 Things I’ve Done Today).

17. Been mugged (also qualifies as “Peed myself”).

18. Kept secrets. Big ones.

19. Screamed at each of my three children in public (see also: Top 22 Things I’ve Done Today).

20. Betrayed a friend.

21. Made sacrifices. Big ones.

22. Surprised myself.

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This entry was posted in It's All About Me, New York City Living and Coping. Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Things I’ve Done (In 22 Lines)

  1. tianac says:

    I can relate to your list very well… We all have those days and times. The only one I haven’t done yet is #1 (maybe because I’m not 40 yet), we’ll just have to wait and see.

    Visiting from Mama Kat’s

  2. Lauren says:

    When were you mugged???
    This is great. I’m curious about all of them!

  3. 1. Told my 9-year-old niece that she was going to eat the f***** sandwich with mayonnaise
    2. Told a cop that the only reason he was taking my pipe was because he needed it to smoke the pot he just confiscated
    3. Shot a childhood friend with a bb gun 🙂
    4. Subscribed to Atlantic Monthly
    5. Went on America Live with Megan Kelly (and posed for a photo after)
    6. Created egregious excuses to get out of work
    7. Sent Barack Obama nasty-grams through whitehouse.gov
    8. Wished Kelly Ripa would be force fed a cheesecake
    9. Brushed my teeth with toilet paper
    10. Moved to NC
    11. Roller skated in an American Apparel skirt at 36
    12. Shopped at American Apparel
    13. Painted wood frames with Body Shop body shimmer powder
    14. Got into a FU fight with an intractable co-worker
    15. Dank Zico
    16. Tried to kill a fruit fly (bastards)
    17. Shoved an ass on the subway who was full-body leaning on the pole during rush hour
    18. Secretly wanted to defend Sarah Palin
    19. Thinks Mitt Romney is reasonable
    20. Deleted The Daily Show/Colbert Report on my DVR when it just gets to be too much
    21. Picked my nose
    22. Taken the free samples from Buzz Agent and not buzzed them

  4. Do you want to know why I really LOVE you? Because you are brutally honest. I try to be… but – sometimes I still feel fake. IF I would have chosen that prompt – I could have posted almost all the things you did (except botox… but if we hit powerball. I’m lyposuctioning my entire body)… I just don’t want to admit them. *sigh* I hate admitting that I’ve done some things I wish I hadn’t. Today I football carried Addison to the table at Red Robin. Doesn’t sound so bad? Except it was upside down. Anyway – Love your list. Love how honest you always are.

    btw… baby boy cooed at me tonight. First time since he’s been sick. And I’m LOVIN’ it too!!! Just thought I’d let you know. Kristen

  5. Count me as another fan of honesty. Love women (and men) who don’t try to fake it. We’ve all done something and you go a long way towards banishing paralyzing, depressing guilt.

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